Ok I got convinced into doing BEDA/Blaugust...

but only because a bunch of my friends are doing it and we are all collaberatively coming up with ideas. I tried BEDA in april but failed miserably because I didnt have enough to talk about so lets try this again.

I guess I can talk about motivation here.

I really should impliment good ideas the second I get them. But I dont. This is bad. Partly because I am a self concious person and I worry about what people will think of me even in video form. I'll come up with an idea and think its really great and then not do it, maybe write it down or something, and then when it comes time to finally do it in video form I either think OTHER PEOPLE will think it's dumb or think that I will look dumb doing it and just not do it.

But that's just video motivation. I procrastinate most other things too. I have a SERIOUS problem with over thinking things. I always think that everything is going to be much worse than it actually is. I tend to freak out about the unknown type of stuff.

I have problems even motivating myself to do things I love. Like reading. I love reading but sometimes it is very hard to get myself to do it. I find that with almost everything a big part of the actual thing is the parts leading up to doing the thing (if that makes sense). Like homework. It sucks but what really sucks is getting in the process of doing it. Once you have all your materials out and your book turned to the right page the actual process of doing homework isnt as bad as it's made out to be. And I tend to put this with everything.

Reading can be tiresome believe it or not. It takes a lot of stamina or some other word that I can not think of at 11:17pm and it can be hard to get in the process of doing it. Many times I just try not to think about it, get off the couch/office chair, pull out the book and just start reading. The first few pages might go slow but it tends to gain speed as I continue with it.

I figure it's probably a good thing that I at least realize I have this particular problem with motivation. I have recognized the problem but still have not come up with a great solution (if you have any IT WOULD BE GREAT TO HEAR ABOUT THEM IN THE COMMENTS).

Well I guess that's it for the thrown together day 1 of blaugust. See i'm already saying this is crap and from your point of view it may not be. I need to work on that self conciousness but that is a topic for another blog.